Dear Corey......

A reader recently wrote me an email asking what I specifically did to lose the weight, eat healthfully, & reach my goals. I thought other people find my answer useful, so I've decided to "reprint" my email response here, which has, of course, been revised & edited in order to preserve & respect the reader's privacy/anonymity:

Thanks for your sincere email & compliments, & for taking the time to write & share your story with me. I can certainly relate to a lot of what you've been through, & it does sound like we have a lot in common. It's really wonderful to know that you feel inspired by what I've written, and likewise inspires me to keep running & writing! ;-)

I agree with you & think that the biggest challenge for most people is not the physical aspect of doing the activity itself, but is rather the challenge of maintaining the motivation & mental stamina to keep going. Simply put, the reason why I'm still motivated to keep running for months (& years) into the activity has as much to do with my attitude & the way I view running as an activity (i.e., my reasons for why I run, its place as a top priority in my life, & my strong attachment to the sport as something than more than just exercise, etc.), as the importance of formulating/starting with a good, solid blueprint for one's fitness & nutrition goals, & developing strategies to deal with the "emotional"/behavioral aspects of the training & weight-loss processes.

The best way to learn more about this (without me having to write a long, detailed explanation ;-) ) is to start at the beginning of my running blog (http://seecoreyrun.blogspot.com/2007/07/welcome-friends-family-visitors.html) & work your way forward. That will most likely answer a lot of your questions. There you'll find not only details about the actual exercise & nutrition plans I used to lose weight & get into shape (i.e., this info can be accessed by going to the "goals" & "tips" categories in the "Looking for Something?" section on the right sidebar of the blog), but also a lot of useful information addressing the mental aspects of the sport & the training process, (& other surrounding issues, like the challenges of maintaining a healthy, balanced perspective on weight management & body image, etc.).

In order to be successful in the long-term, it's really important to plan out not just the physical steps for getting into shape & losing weight, but also develop coping strategies & guidelines to help you through the emotional challenges as well. I've found that it's really important to be gentle with yourself & also to be fluid in your approach to your goals. Your goals & plans are an ever-changing work-in-progress, & so, will be better used as a general roadmap versus a set of hard-&-fast rules for change.

I certainly understand the challenges of striving to balance a busy schedule with fitness imperatives. It's not just about finding life balance like it's some Zen discovery mission. ;-) It's also about nuts & bolts type of stuff: Setting quantifiable, realistic expectations & goals for oneself, time & stress management, performance metrics & accountability, & about finding & reinforcing one's priorities. It's less about trying to being perfect & more about trying to make progress. I think the key is focusing on what you can change & what IS working for you versus focusing on what you can't change or ISN'T working for you. I know this might seem glib or simplistic, but at the same time, this approach really DOES work.

And, from what you've written, it sounds like you are facing a lot of "internal resistance," which is of course why you've found it a challenge to start & also stay motivated to run. ;-)

Also, I noticed that you are currently using an external motivator to jumpstart your fitness program. Having used the same tactic myself & looking back upon the experience, I would definitely say that this is only the tip of the "motivation iceberg." There's nothing wrong with doing this, as it'll certainly start you off on your path to fitness, but that in order to stay motivated long-term, you'll need to find deeper reasons to run. For most of us, that self-discovery is not something that happens instantaneously; it's a long-term process, & will most likely happen naturally as you run. As I trained, I rediscovered the runner in me, and it was no longer just about fitness, but became something more.

That's one of the fantastic things about running -- It totally changed my attitude. Now, I'm not saying that I'm suddenly perfect, because you'll see a lot of grouchy posts & missed runs in there too!, but rather that I didn't let the grouchiness & low moments stop me; I learned how to become bigger than the emotions, & not let them waylay or distract me -- I still felt & expressed the emotions, but instead of getting bogged down by them or letting them get the best of me, I gave them voice & then just let them pass over me. (Bad moods are like inclement weather; just wait a while & they'll pass!) Basically, I was determined not to let a little crankiness get in the way of running. ;-)

My biggest & profoundest piece of advice I can offer to you is that if you begin to focus on what you have going for you & what you CAN do (instead of focusing on the numbers on the scale or on a closetful of clothes which no longer fit you), because THAT will motivate you to get out the door, & begin your journey back to you. I've certainly been where you are right now, mentally & physically speaking, so I can certainly relate to those behavior patterns.

It's simply fantastic that you remember how great running feels. THAT's the kind of stuff that you need to focus on right now, which will start you off & also carry you through training.

It's also really important for you to be honest with yourself about how you think & feel as you move through the training/running process. Having a outlet (i.e., a personal journal or blog!) for this expression can be highly useful towards this end. It'll be easier to hear those internal voices when they are brought to the fore, & once you're conscious of them, you can evaluate their usefulness, & use the exercise as a tool to determine your priorities & further shape your own outlook.

As you've probably already gathered, I likewise talk very honestly about my own personal experiences & challenges on my blog -- I write as my imperfect self, & how I am in the moment, & not about what I wish I was. I try to take it day by day, and step by step. I write about long-term & short-term goals, but find it most useful to focus on the goals of the near & immediate future (i.e., tomorrow or next week, as opposed to 5 years down the road). I find that this particular approach helps me stay focused on the "doing" & "being" part of running, versus getting stuck in the "reflection" & "analysis" parts of the equation. ;-) All parts are important, but the blog helps me table the "reflection" part, & keep it in perspective with the other parts of the process.

You might likewise find it helpful to chronicle your own journey back to becoming a runner, either in a blog or a written diary/journal of your own. If you do decide to start your own running blog, please let me know, & I'd be happy to help connect you to some fantastic running blog directories & other resources. If you feel comfortable sharing the URL of your blog with me, I'd be interested in subscribing to follow & support your journey back to a healthy you! You're also welcome to mark me as a friend or contact on any of the social networking communities listed at the bottom of my blog.

Thanks for writing & for also being a faithful reader of my blogs! I sincerely wish you success in becoming happy & healthy again!

Best wishes,
Corey

Run, Run, Run!

At 8:19 pm tonight, I ran 4 laps (2.96 miles) in 33:28, or an 11:18 minute-per-mile pace in approximately 66-70 degree weather. At the time I was running, it felt like I was running really fast -- in fact, much faster than my last run -- but apparently it was all in my head! ;-) I've learned from experience that sometimes running at night in a cool breeze can be deceptive. Even when I've felt like I've had a really fast, strong run, I'm often surprised when I check my iPod stopwatch afterwards! ;-) Even though the large & rather unwieldy crowds of people slowed me down a bit tonight, I still felt like I was really motoring past them when I was able to break free!

At any rate, I was definitely putting in the effort, working my heart & legs & not letting up, even as I was tiring towards the end. Mid-way through lap #3, my energy began to flag a bit & I began to slow down slightly & also think thoughts like "Oh, I'd really like to slow it down, or stop, or just go home & plop down on the couch right about now," but then told myself to ignore that lazy thought & keep going, which is exactly what I did! ;-) Thankfully, at that very moment, a really inspirational song started to play on my Pod with an insane number of beats-per-minute that got me all pumped up again to keep going!

Have you ever had that warm flush of energy just rush into you when you listen to a tune that makes your entire being tingle with excitement?! Now THAT's exactly the feeling I'm talking about here. It's a a spontaneous burst of adrenaline-charged energy, spurred on by inspirational music & then it just suddenly morphs into a runner's high!

I literally leaped out ahead of everyone like a gazelle & just breezed past the crowds like they were moving in slow-motion! I just felt this incredible surge of energy, which seemed to come from out of nowhere, & just couldn't stop myself from propelling myself forward like a super-turbo-charged rocket launcher. It was fantastic! The only other time I slowed slightly was to recover from a side-stitch which set in during the second half of the final lap; however I sped up again after it went away, & had a really strong finish. I guess that was my "badge of honor" for all of that effort. Hahahahaha.

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Some final footnotes: Right now, I'm not really following any running plan or program per se. My friend is out-of-commission due to her knee, & so lately I've been doing my own thing. We stopped the CT5K program right before the Day 3 of Week 5, i.e., before the start of the first 20 consecutive minutes of running, so I figured I could easily just skip ahead to 25 minutes (i.e., Day 3 of Week 6) & then do 30-minute runs for a while.

In essence, I'm basically doing the first part of the BOHR program, running 30+ minutes for three weeks, & then seeing where my fitness level is before deciding upon the next step.

Frankly, I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do when my friend rejoins me for our runs. In addition to her being out of commission due to her knee, we're also facing scheduling challenges, due to the fact that my new job & her existing job don't have similar hours. I don't want to resort to doing double runs again (i.e., a joint run followed by a solo run, or vice versa, etc.), as I think that played a role in burning me out a bit last time. Of course, I'm not about to stop running, but I also don't want to have to backtrack to an earlier stage. I also don't want her to feel pressured to run before she's ready, as neither of us wants to see her incur further injury.

A possible solution could be that we still could meet at the lake twice a week, but would only start out running together for only the first few consecutive minutes & then each do our own separate thing. I know it's not anywhere near as social, but atleast this way, we could do some part of our run together.

Hmmmmm. On the one hand I feel sincerely attached to my friend, enjoy running with her, & of course, want to see her succeed (i.e., before we stopped running together, she was just starting to get that internal spark of motivation to keep running), but on the other hand it's certainly important that I run to the best of my ability, & not hold back my own progress. There has to be a way to join together both priorities somehow as a common goal. Hopefully, we'll find a way to make this work.

I'm hoping she'll agree to the above plan, atleast until she's able to "catch up" to me fitness-wise, in as much as is realistically possible. Of course, I'm not saying that we've got to be at the exact same point in our fitness, but I'm hoping she'll atleast be able to get to the point where she can run 20+ minutes consecutively. Then we atleast have a better shot at making our joint runs work.

The additional kicker is that I don't have nearly as much scheduling flexibility as I once had when I ran my own businesses & did freelance consulting, nor do I have very much leisure time these days -- So it's imperative that every moment count! My time is very tightly managed right now, & it's just something new that I & everyone else who interacts with me will have to accept & get used to at this point. This is not said to be rude or insensitive. It's just a fact of my current existence. That's just the way it is.

This also means that I've also not been able to blog or respond to comments quite as often as I'd like -- In fact, my running blog is one of the few & only blogs to which I've contributed to on a regular basis, as running has been the most essential activities to buoying my existence right now & maintaining a healthy perspective on all of the above-described changes.

On that note, commenters, please don't be discouraged by my lack of responses; I've read all of your comments & certainly appreciate every single one! Thank you most sincerely! I really do enjoy listening to your thoughts.

Hope you have a great night!
-C

I Lost 5 Pounds!

I'm happy to report that I lost 5 pounds since the last time I weighed myself, which was almost a month ago, on 4/29/08!!!! As you can see, I'm keeping my word about not weighing myself too often. ;-) I forgot to take a BF% measurement this morning (on my scale), but just looking at myself in the mirror, I can tell that this number has definitely gone down as well.

Excepting this past week (i.e., my last run was a week ago!), I have been fairly consistent in my running (i.e., 2-3 times per week) over the last two months or so. Plus, my new job is very active, so that very likely also explains a good bit of the weight loss.

OK, well I've got to run, literally. Will check in later with a running report. See ya!

Thank You For Your Generous Contributions!

I'd just like to express a big thank you to the individuals who've joined with me to generously donate money in support of breast cancer research. Thanks so much for your contributions to this very important cause!

The Susan G. Komen National Race for The Cure -- Please Help Support Breast Cancer Research!

Many, if not most of us, know someone who's been affected by this deadly disease. By donating even the smallest amount, you'll be helping in the fight to eradicate breast cancer. You have the chance to make a difference in someone else's life -- And this "someone" could very well be someone you know & love -- your wife/partner, sister, mother, or friend! Please join me in my efforts to support The Susan G. Komen National Race for the Cure! Your generous gift of $5, $10, $20, $50, or any amount is greatly appreciated! Thanks!


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